


What's In A Name?

by YamiSnuffles



Category: Star Wars - All Media Types, Star Wars Prequel Trilogy, Star Wars: The Clone Wars (2008) - All Media Types
Genre: Angst, Character Death, Comedy, Fluff, Found Family, Friendship, Gen, Slavery
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-12-19
Updated: 2016-12-19
Packaged: 2018-09-09 21:17:47
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 10
Words: 15,237
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8912317
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/YamiSnuffles/pseuds/YamiSnuffles
Summary: Obi-Wan has a knack for saying a lot with just one word. A collection of vignettes focusing on Obi-Wan, Anakin, and all the different ways Obi-Wan uses his apprentice's name. Stretches from Obi-Wan's own apprenticeship in the prologue to the end of RotJ.





	1. Prologue

**Author's Note:**

> Written ages ago and posted on ff.net. Now edited and reposted here.

Prologue:

Obi-Wan Kenobi and Qui-Gon Jinn sat in their private quarters on the transport ship. They were on their way to help on a fairly standard negotiation mission. Obi-Wan lay sprawled on his bed perusing the information on the two warring factions. He'd already read through the datapad a number of times, but it was a long journey. He wanted to have all the information memorized perfectly so that he would not let his master down.

Across the small room, Qui-Gon was seated in a chair overlooking a view port. For the past few hours he seemed to have been lost in meditation as he stared out at the swirling colors of hyperspace. Obi-Wan was starting to get restless but he didn't want to disturb his master. As if reading his thoughts, Qui-Gon suddenly turned to look at his padawan.

"Obi-Wan."

Obi-Wan instantly sat up at attention and turned the datapad off.

"Yes, Master?"

"Would you like to know one of the keys of negotiation?"

Obi-Wan nodded quickly. He wasn't sure what his master could tell him that he hadn't already learned in a class or on a mission, but he was never one to ignore his master's wisdom.

"Words," Qui-Gon said simply.

"Words, Master?"

"Words, Padawan."

Obi-Wan scrunched his eyebrows slightly. Sometimes his master was more inscrutable than even Master Yoda. He didn’t want to admit to his confusion at so simple a lesson but if Qui-Gon was imparting valuable wisdom, he didn’t want to miss out just because it prickled at his pride.

"I don't understand, Master. Obviously words are important to negotiation."

"Obviously," Qui-Gon said dryly.

Obi-Wan could feel his cheeks heat. He felt stupid, like he was missing something obvious. He found himself at an ironic loss for words. "I don't think that I understand.”

Qui-Gon smiled.

"The key to negotiation is not the words themselves but how you use them. It doesn't matter what you say, if you say it wrong. Using the correct word incorrectly can be disastrous. This is because one word can have many meanings." Again, Obi-Wan nodded. He thought he understood but he waited knowing Qui-Gon had more to say on the subject. "What do you think of when I use the word 'master'?"

"I think of you, Master" Obi-Wan said.

"But it can mean other things, can it not, my Padawan?"

"Yes, Master."

"For some, a master is an owner. Yet, to hear you say the word master, do you think that others would assume you are my slave?"

"No, Master. They would notice the way I said it. Instead of fear or hatred, they would... they would notice different emotions," Obi-Wan replied, his voice getting quieter as he spoke. He'd wanted to say that others would hear that he respected and loved the man he called master. That he used the word 'master' as others might use the word 'father.' Instead he said, "I think they would recognize that you were my teacher."

Qui-Gon's eyes sparkled slightly. If he noticed the emotion behind what his apprentice said, he let it pass without admonishment. "Very good, Padawan. And the better the listener knows the speaker, the more meanings words can take on. Suddenly even one simple word can seem to take on hundreds of meanings."

Obi-Wan smiled and said, "I understand, Master."

And he did. As with all of Qui-Gon's teachings, Obi-Wan kept it close to his heart. He always chose his words carefully and was mindful of how he said them. What he never would have guessed was that the word that would gain the most meanings over the years, was not a word at all but a name. It seemed a thousand unspoken things passed through his mouth every time he said the name of his apprentice.


	2. The Nickname

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Set not long after the end of TPM.

* * *

"Ani."

Two syllables, spoken warmly but clumsily.

Obi-Wan was a rather formal person. He'd be the first to admit it. Somehow calling even his own apprentice by a nickname seemed too personal. And maybe that was the very thing of it. On some level, Obi-Wan knew that he opened his heart far wider than a Jedi should. He cared too much for those close to him. To the world, he'd just lost his master. In his heart, he'd lost his father. Then, when he'd accepted his master's dying wish- when he'd agreed to raise a child- he'd put his soul into it. And so he clung to formality, so that even Anakin would not see the weak man behind the Jedi exterior.

Now though, now Anakin was sick. So sick, he wouldn't notice little things like his master using nicknames as a veiled bribe to wake up. Anakin had been in a fitful sleep for the past three days. The young boy's light tan had all but drained away. His face was pale and flushed. A thick sheen of sweat coated his skin.

Obi-Wan sighed and dipped a towel in cooling water. He rested the towel on the boy's fiery forehead. According to the Temple healers, Anakin had somehow managed to contract dust fever. It was apparently a common ailment for children on Tatooine. Whether it had somehow remained latent in the boy in the weeks since he'd left his home planet, or if he'd somehow managed to contract it afterward, was a mystery. At any rate, the healers had assured Obi-Wan it was far from life threatening. Anakin would run a fever and would suffer through strange dreams for the duration of the sickness. THe best thing Obi-Wan could do was watch over his apprentice and calm him as best he could until the disease ran its course.

Anakin mumbled something incomprehensible in his sleep. His elfin features crinkled as a frown formed firmly on his young face. Obi-Wan ran a hand tentatively through sandy blond hair.

"Ani, wake up," Obi-Wan said.

The nickname still felt foreign on his tongue, but he hoped the familiarity would better soothe the sick child. For a moment it seemed to. Anakin's features relaxed again and he appeared peaceful. It, apparently, was not to last. Anakin started to scream. Obi-Wan froze. What should he do? What could he do?

He placed both hands on tiny shoulders and shook Anakin lightly.

"Padawan. Anakin. Ani... wake up. You need to wake up," he said, a slight edge of panic creeping into his voice instead of the authority he'd been aiming for.

Still Anakin screamed. Obi-Wan's heart clenched painfully in his chest. He didn't know what to do. Nothing in his Jedi training had prepared him to comfort a sick child. He wasn't built for this. Only, part of him realized, he was built for this. Not his mind, logical to a fault, but his heart. So, for once, he would let himself be guided by his heart if it would be enough to help ease Anakin's suffering.

Obi-Wan moved from his chair and eased gently onto the edge of Anakin's bed. He pulled the child into his arms. With Anakin carefully cradled in his lap, Obi-Wan gently rocked the boy. It wasn't a very graceful motion. As sure and smooth as his movements might usually be, Obi-Wan wasn't really practiced in physical contact; Qui-Gon had usually comforted with words and maybe a hand on the shoulder. Anakin, it seemed, demanded much more.

Muttering quiet, hopefully comforting nonsense, Obi-Wan continued to try to sooth away Anakin's nightmares. The screaming finally started to die away but Anakin still looked stricken. Tears had started pooling at the corners of his tightly shut eyes. Instead of screaming, he was now whimpering.

Obi-Wan grimaced. Not for the first time since he'd become a master, he felt completely helpless. He did not regret his promise to Qui-Gon. Nonetheless, he constantly felt unprepared and unqualified for the job. This time, in all reality, he probably really was. He knew that the disease just needed to run its course and he wasn't going to do any good fretting. Still, he couldn't help but at least try. He had no idea what to do, but he felt sure that he had to do something.

If traditional forms of reassurance wouldn’t work, Obi-Wan would fall back on more practised forms. He closed his eyes and did his best to center himself. After finding some level of calm, he tried to send some of that calm through the Force to Anakin. He let the Force flow through him and deep inside of him. It stirred up memories, long buried and forgotten. Before he was really conscious of doing it, Obi-Wan started to sing softly. He didn't stop to consider where he'd heard the tune, he just sang.

It seemed to do what nothing else had. Anakin's features became relaxed and calm. His whimpering became a contented sigh. Obi-Wan continued his quiet song until he was sure that Anakin's nightmares had passed. He sensed out Anakin's presence in the Force and sighed in relief. The worst of the turmoil was over. For now, Anakin would be granted a dreamless sleep.

Assured, Obi-Wan slid the boy carefully back into his bed and tucked him in. The smallest hint of a smile quirked at the corners of Anakin's mouth. When he saw it, Obi-Wan smiled also. He was still sure that he was not prepared for any of this, but seeing that smile, he knew he would never stop trying.


	3. The Question

"Anakin?"

Low, hesitant.

Obi-Wan wasn’t quite sure he wanted an answer to the one word inquiry. The boy was fidgeting around with some new droid. Obi-Wan had quickly learned that Anakin got that way when he was uncomfortable. Obi-Wan thought he understood. Anakin had a problem he couldn’t solve and so he turned to something he understood. Although, instead of actually working on anything, he would just sort of poke and prod at the machinery.

"Yes, Master?" Anakin replied.

His voice was a little squeaky. Was ten too young for a voice change? Obi-Wan certainly couldn't remember. He felt he couldn’t be faulted if, like many beings, he’d blocked out that part of his life. Besides, Jedi weren’t meant to dwell on the past.

"You said there was something you wanted to ask me about?"

Anakin didn’t put down his tools. His continued tinkering was surely not a good sign but Obi-Wan is determined to wait him out. Anakin kept his eyes carefully trained on the droid before him as he asked, "What does 'hit it and quit it' mean?"

"What?" Now it was Obi-Wan's voice that was embarrassingly squeaky. Was twenty-six too old for a voice change? Almost certainly. Blast. No recovering dignity then. The unusual sound was enough to bring Anakin's eyes up a bit. For once, Obi-Wan wished the boy would go back to pushing his feelings onto scraps of metal and wire. "Where did you hear a phrase like that, Padawan?”

Well, at least his voice was back under control. Thank the Force for small mercies. Although, with this line of questioning, he was absolutely certain it was only the first in a line of indignities.

"Well," Anakin drew out the word as if feeling it out in his mouth, "I was at one of the trash heaps in the lower levels-"

Obi-Wan sighed. He knew there was a reason he should have been keeping a tighter leash on his errant apprentice. He pushed that concern aside for the time and nodded his head for the boy to continue, certain at the same time that he'd rather Anakin do anything but.

"-and some guys saw that I was from the Temple. They asked... they asked if it was really true that the Jedi had an official policy to hit it and quit it. And I didn't know what to say and I felt bad because I've been trying really hard to learn all the rules of the Jedi but there are so many-"

Obi-Wan held up a hand to end the flow of words. He could already feel his face warming by a few degrees. He was certain his cheeks were preparing to tinge red if they weren’t scarlet already. Control. He had to keep control. Keep his dignity. Or what was left of it. He cleared his throat.

"Well, Padawan, you are aware of the rule against attachment?"

"Yes, Master."

"Yes, well, even though a Jedi must not form attachments, they still have... er... some still want... all beings have... urges."

The last word was a squeak again. So much for dignity. Now he was certain that no amount of control would save him from looking the fool in front of his Padawan.

"Urges, Master?"

Obi-Wan coughs, "Yes."

"What kind of urges?"

Not for the first time, Obi-Wan wished Anakin had enjoyed a normal Jedi upbringing. Usually masters didn't have to give this kind of talk. By the time any Initiate became a Padawan, they'd already received instruction. Obi-Wan was half tempted to run off to one of the masters who usually dealt with such things. The only thing that stopped him was a desire to prevent the phrase "hit it and quit it" from being uttered inside Temple walls again.

"Urges, yes, um, well," Obi-Wan said, his voice still tight. He’d been unprepared for a great many things in the last couple of years but, at that very moment, this felt like the worst of it. "At a certain point in every being's life, there comes the desire to... to procreate."

"You mean sex?"

Forget his cheeks, his face had to be red to the hairline. Obi-Wan nodded, a bit more vigorously than he intended. Of course the boy would have some idea about sex. Tatooine wasn't the most refined place. Obi-Wan had quickly brushed up on huttese after taking the child as an apprentice, though he sometimes wished he hadn’t. Some of the words that Anakin muttered for example were the sort of thing no child ought to know about. But he had the knowledge, so it was up to Obi-Wan to teach him about the right way.

"Yes..." Obi-Wan cleared his throat again in a likely futile attempt to get his vocal chords back under control. "Sex." Well, that was about the right pitch. Good. "Well, as I was saying, many beings still desire to engage in... in... such things even though the Jedi do not allow attachments. So, even though it's not necessarily encouraged, but I suppose it's not really discouraged either-"

"Master, you're rambling."

Normally Obi-Wan would have admonished his padawan for such cheekiness, but he had a feeling he would be too tempted to use it as an excuse to avoid this conversation. Jedi faced problems head on. With dignity. Dignity. Maybe if he said it enough he'd get it back.

Obi-Wan swallowed hard.

"So I was. Well, ah, Jedi are still allowed... encounters... so long as they are casual. No attachments."

For the first time Obi-Wan could remember, Anakin seemed to really stop and think things over. Why, of all lessons, did this have to be the one that finally had Anakin's complete attention? And just what was the boy thinking about? Obi-Wan was too flustered to get any sort of reading off Anakin in the Force. As for accessing the Force at a time like this... Obi-Wan was too worried his own thoughts would be broadcast to everyone in the Temple. In the galaxy.

"So those guys were right? It is a rule?"

"Not a rule, exactly. More a, ah, recommendation."

"That seems pretty cruel. What happens if they leave a kid behind? That's what sex does right?"

How did Anakin even know that much? From what Obi-Wan had heard, the child's conception was less than standard. Not that he was complaining. A little less to explain himself.

"Yes, that can happen. That's why it's important to use, well, protection. There are plenty of methods in the galaxy to prevent pregnancy," Obi-Wan said, his throat dry now and his face burning. "I'm sure they'll go over those in one of your classes when you're a bit older."

At least Obi-Wan prayed they would. He didn't think he could live through more of this. If not, he'd find someone to explain it. Anyone. Well, maybe not Mace or Yoda. He didn't want to traumatize the boy. Or maybe he should. Obi-Wan sighed.

"Does that explain everything, Padawan?" he asked, praying to the Force that it was enough.

To his absolute relief, Anakin nodded.

"Yes, Master, thank you for explaining," the boy said, but he continued fiddling absentmindedly with his droid.

Obi-Wan raised an eyebrow, though he quickly wished he hadn’t so much as offered up an unspoken invitation for more questioning.

"Have you ever done it?"

That was one question too far. Obi-Wan wondered if it was, perhaps, possible to simply fade into the Force at will.

"That's... Padawan... I... it's not polite to ask such things," he stammered. So much for being a promising negotiator.

"Sorry, Master," Anakin said in a tone that implied he was anything but. Actually, he was starting to look quite amused at his Master's behavior. "But have you?"

Obi-Wan strode purposefully into the kitchen. Maybe if he made tea, did anything, he could distract himself from the distinctive desire to jump out a window. He was suddenly quite sympathetic to Anakin’s penchant to tinker when troubled.

With his head safely hidden inside a cabinet as he foraged for tea, he said, "Despite what some ruffians on the street might have implied, not every Jedi acts the same way. As with any being, Jedi or not, there are those who seek out such casual encounters and those who abstain."

Obi-Wan could feel the youth's gaze on him, even without seeing him. He'd found the tea already, but was frozen in place. He had completely dodged the question and now he could only wait to see if Anakin would notice.

"I think I understand, Master. I’m glad.”

Glad? Clearly Anakin had made an assumption about where Obi-Wan stood on the issue but he wasn’t about to ask for details. Anakin, on the other hand, was happy to offer up an explanation whether he’d been asked or not.

“I've seen the way women look at you. And men sometimes too. I guess I probably would have heard it if you brought that many people back to the Temple. Then again, I hear some people don't make much noise. And you are a very quiet person, Master."

Ten. Anakin was only ten and he was saying these kinds of things. Obi-Wan would never survive another year. Now he was sure he really could die. Hello, Master Qui-Gon, I've joined you in the Force. The boy you left me with has killed me at last.

Obi-Wan pulled out a tea packet and set about preparing it. Still solidly refusing to look at Anakin, he instead focused on regulating his breathing. He had to find his center. Oh blast it all, he was too far gone. Best to just try to end this.

"Padawan, I've not been bringing people home," he said, his voice miraculously firm. "As I said, there are many schools of thought on the matter. Some believe it should be between two people who care deeply for each other. Maybe even, only for two who are married to each other."

There. That should end it. Marriage was a definite taboo for attachment free Jedi. Obi-Wan stirred his tea, confident that he was free at last of that abominable line of questioning. Despite his confidence that he’d put an end to it, Anakin seemed to be thinking deeply again. Obi-Wan took a hesitant sip and waited with some measure of dread for his Padawan to speak again.

"I think that sounds best to me, Master. Hopefully Padme will agree to marry me," Anakin said brightly.

With that, the boy hurried off to his room and took his droid with him, leaving Obi-Wan trying to cough steaming hot tea out of his lungs.


	4. The Gift

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Borrows a bit of lore from the Jedi Apprentice book series.

"Anakin."

The smile on Obi-Wan's face carried into his voice. The boy looked a mess and for once, Obi-Wan couldn’t help but grin at that. Anakin's short, trimmed hair was completely flattened on one side of his head and stuck out in every unruly direction on the other side. A line of drool had dried at the corner of his mouth. His sleep clothes were rumpled and stained with something Obi-Wan suspected to be grease.

Ordinarily, Obi-Wan might have chastised his apprentice, but today was not an ordinary day. Today was Anakin's birthday. Granted, it was not long after sunrise on Anakin's birthday, which more than explained the boy's current state; Anakin was anything but an early riser. He could be completely awake and alert at the drop of a hat, but that didn't mean he didn't like to sleep in.

Obi-Wan had considered indulging Anakin, but found he was just too excited. It was, after all, Anakin's thirteenth birthday. Obi-Wan had thought long and hard about just what he wanted to give Anakin for this momentous birthday. No matter how he thought about it, though, his mind always came back to just one thing. He knew the perfect thing to give Anakin, and once he'd decided on it, he found he could hardly wait to give it.

"Master, couldn't I have slept in just this once?" Anakin asked, his voice a little muzzy with sleep.

"Well, you are perfectly free to go back to bed if you're not interested in getting your birthday gift, Padawan," Obi-Wan said. He made sure to train his expression into blank disinterest; it was a hard ruse to keep up with the smile that flashed onto Anakin's face at the statement.

"A present?" Anakin said with bald disbelief.

Obi-Wan couldn't blame Anakin for the doubt. As a slave he'd no doubt received little to mark the day throughout his life. Because of that, Obi-Wan had found he enjoyed indulging Anakin with little gifts each birthday. It was an unusual thing for a Master- a Jedi- to do, to be sure, but Anakin was an unusual Padawan. They were never ordinary gifts. In fact, Anakin was probably unaware he'd even been given them at the time. One year, Obi-Wan had arranged for Anakin to help repair ships in the Temple hangar. Another year, he'd gotten wind of a rare droid part Anakin was scrounging for and he'd cleverly bought and hidden that piece for the boy to find at the dump. This year he could finally just give the present directly to Anakin.

"Of course. You do know you're thirteenth birthday is an important one, correct Padawan?"

Anakin bobbed his head vigorously. He knew quite well that today a special gift waited for him. He pursed his lips slightly as he tried to guess what that might be.

"Did you get me a podracer?" he asked.

"Can't you just build your own?" Obi-Wan replied with a raised eyebrow.

"My own starship?"

"Ah, no."

"A trip to Naboo to visit Padmé?"

To which Obi-Wan merely laughed.

"Okay, so you didn't get me anything I want," Anakin said, his voice dripping with mock despair. Obi-Wan laughed again before Anakin continued speaking. "So what did you get me? Some datapads filled with information on the unique anatomy of the Kashyyyk leaflizard?"

"Padawan, you have such little faith in me. Obviously I would get you information on the sand lizard. I hear they make a lovely pie when prepared right."

"Enough joking, Master. Just tell me what you got already."

"Patience, my young apprentice," Obi-Wan said, but he was already fishing the gift out of a pocket in his tunic.

Anakin held out his hands expectantly and was surprised when a rock dropped into his palms. It was a smooth, black stone, veined with deep red. It was a dear sight to Obi-Wan, but Anakin seemed less than thrilled. His face dropped momentarily before he was able to train it into a forced smile.

"Thank you," the teen said and it was more of a question than a statement.

Despite himself, Obi-Wan started laughing. He distinctly remembered how dubious he'd been when Qui-Gon had given him the rock so many years ago. He only hoped he'd hidden his initial disappointment better than his padawan currently was.

"I can take it back," he said dryly, his hand extended.

"No," Anakin shot back immediately. He drew his hands in and clutched the rock to his chest as if it was suddenly his dearest possession.

"Are you sure? It's not too late for me to get you those datapads you wanted," Obi-Wan said.

"No it's great. Only..." Anakin said slowly.

"What is it?" Obi-Wan guessed. Anakin nodded his head. "It's a rock."

Anakin looked like he was fighting the urge to stick his tongue out. He held the rock out and turned it over slowly in his hands. After a moment, a bit of understanding seemed to light up his eyes.

"It's Force sensitive," he said with a broad grin.

"Really? Well, give it back then," Obi-Wan teased.

Anakin ignored the remark. His full attention was on the river rock now. He was examining it with the kind of precise detail that Obi-Wan usually associated with the boy fixing some mechanical problem. Anakin's blue eyes fluttered shut as he felt out the rock's presence in the Force. A warm smiled settled on his face.

With his eyes still closed, he said, "It feels like you, Master. And... Qui-Gon."

"It was his originally. It came from a river on his home planet," Obi-Wan explained. "Then he gave it to me on my thirteenth birthday. It saved my life not long after that."

"Really?" Anakin asked. He was clearly skeptical that a rock, even a Force sensitive rock, could do that much.

"Really. I got captured and would have had my memory completely wiped if I hadn't had that rock with me. It helped me hold onto all of my memories so that I could survive when I got dumped off on another planet."

"So, if I used the Force, could I see your memories," Anakin said. There was a glint in his eyes that made Obi-Wan grimace.

"No," he said flatly. "I don't know what sort of ideas you have about my memories. I was thirteen. There wouldn't be anything... scandalous."

"Not then maybe, but you've had it with you at all times since then," Anakin replied with a sly grin.

Obi-Wan could feel his cheeks warm as a few memories flashed into his mind at the comment. He cleared his throat.

"Yes, well, why don't you go back to bed, Anakin? Sleep in and enjoy your birthday. Then you'll be well rested for your meditations," he said.

Anakin groaned. "Meditation? On my birthday?"

"Yes, it's very important. And it's traditional for a Padawan on his thirteenth birthday," Obi-Wan responded.

He shooed the teenager back to his bedroom. Anakin grumbled and muttered all the way into his room. Obi-Wan was pleased that for the moment the topic of his past had been forgotten in light of meditation. He hoped it would stay that way. He also hoped that he was right about Anakin not being able to gain access to any such memories through the stone.


	5. The Sacrifice: Part One

"Anakin."

His voice was perfectly calm. Perfectly collected. Surprisingly, he found he actually felt that way. He was ready to die. Anakin, it seemed, was not so ready.

"No, Master. I won't allow it," he responded, shaking his head vigorously.

"I think you are forgetting which one of us is the Master here," Obi-Wan said.

"And I think you're forgetting that I'm no longer your Padawan. You can't stop me from stopping you."

"I can. Maybe just this once, but I can stop you and I will," Obi-Wan said, his voice still utterly even. Long ago, he'd said something very similar to Qui-Gon. Now, just as then, he was completely prepared to lay down his life to save another. Unlike the last time, there would be no last minute save. There was only one option.

"No," Anakin said again, as if reading his thoughts. "No. There has to be another way."

"You know there isn't. My ship was shot down and your ship can only take one of us. We both know you're the better pilot. You have the best chance of getting out of here and delivering the data crystal. Do not sacrifice the lives of countless innocents for mine."

"And I suppose you would do it without a second thought?" Anakin asked.

"If the tables were turned, I would do my duty." And he was glad he would not have to test that statement.

"Of course you would," Anakin spat. "Well, I'm not you, Obi-Wan. I won't sentence a friend to death."

Obi-Wan took a deep breath and released it slowly. His calm was starting to slip. He didn't want it to come to this, but he didn't see another way. The truth would hurt Anakin, but if it would motivate him to do what he had to do, Obi-Wan would have to tell him.

"That death sentence has already been given," he said.

"What?" Anakin looked like he'd been hit, like he was somewhere between wanting to vomit and wanting to destroy something. He was an absolute muddle of contradictions in a way only he could be. He stared deep into Obi-Wan's eyes and said, quite simply, "No."

"Check if you don't believe me."

It was a pointless statement. Anakin knew that Obi-Wan wouldn't lie to him, especially about something like this. All the same, Obi-Wan knew that Anakin would have to have to see it for himself. Anakin raised a trembling hand and let it hover just above Obi-Wan's forehead. The look on the younger man's face when he sensed the truth was enough to pierce Obi-Wan's heart.

"When? How?"

Obi-Wan sighed. "Does it matter? It wasn't your fault. But you can make sure that I'm the last victim of this virus. Get that data crystal into the right hands."

Anakin immediately pulled the data crystal from his belt and tried to force it into Obi-Wan's hands.

"You have to take it then. You have to. You need to get out of here right now. Get off this Force forsaken graveyard of a planet. If you give them the crystal, there will still be time. They can still-"

"Anakin."

"No!" Anakin's voice was a vicious roar. He was up on his feet now, pacing in front of a kneeling Obi-Wan. "There is still time for you. If only one of us can go, then you go. I can stay here and fight. I'll be the bait this time. You go. Just go."

"You can't fight everything, Anakin."

Anakin rounded on his former master. He grabbed onto Obi-Wan's tunic, his eyes ablaze.

"And you shouldn't be so kriffing resigned to this! You go on and on about duty but did you ever think that maybe it means more than just getting yourself killed whenever it seems convenient? What do you think will happen to the Jedi Order without you? For more than half my life I've had people telling me I'm the Chosen One. No one has ever looked up to me for that. They fear me. They mistrust me. They all expect me to save their skins, but not a single one of them ever wants to become like me. I don't want to be me most of the time. But for just as long as I've watched people shrink from me, I've watched them drawn to you. You don't see it because you're stupid but they all look to you. They need you as much as they need me. More. And I- I..."

The furious flow of words stuttered to an end as Anakin started to weep. He fell to his knees, still clutching onto Obi-Wan as though his former master would just fade into the Force. Anakin's eyes were all fire and water then, as he continued to stare at Obi-Wan.

"What good am I- how can I save anything if I can't save that?"

Obi-Wan reached up and placed his hands on both of Anakin's shoulders. Anakin relaxed under the familiar gesture. His hands fell limp onto his legs. Obi-Wan stared back at him. He hoped his eyes didn’t give away his pain.

"I'm sorry Anakin."

It took Anakin a moment to truly understand what Obi-Wan meant by those words, and by then, it was too late. Obi-Wan had been gently gathering the Force around him as they spoke. As soon as he said those final words, he used the power to fling his former apprentice in one direction as he leaped in the opposite direction. Anakin sailed through empty space over the edge of a cliff. Obi-Wan was confident that Anakin would easily stop the fall, so he didn't waste time looking back. Now was not the time for second guessing and doubts. Anakin would forgive him in time. If not... well, at least Anakin would be safe. Obi-Wan would not have failed in his promise to Qui-Gon. Lightsaber raised, Obi-Wan charged headlong into the heart of a Separatist base.

Perhaps it was because he was so close to death, but Obi-Wan had never felt more one with the Force. It was like he was no longer a part of his body. Flesh and bone and lightsaber were all just tools of the Force. A roll and a thrust into the heart of a destroyer droid. A deflected blaster bolt. A disabled vulture droid. Every movement had purpose. Obi-Wan felt like every cell in his body was alight with power. All the while he was aware that pushing his body would speed up the attack of the virus inside of him. As long as this worked- as long as he distracted the Separatists from Anakin's escape- then it wouldn't matter.

Out of the corner of his eye, he saw Anakin's yellow and grey vessel dart through the sky. The sight of it drove Obi-Wan on faster. He was a flurry of motion; he seemed to be everywhere at once and even the best droids had trouble keeping track of him. He cut down the last line of droids between him and the control building. With one strong kick, he was through the door. Every droid in the room was promptly cut down and then moved with the Force to barricade the entrance.

Obi-Wan scanned the room. It didn't take long to locate the panel that controlled the laser array protecting the planet. Not bothering with finesse, he sliced through the panel with his lightsaber. With the array out of commission, Anakin would be able to escape easily. Obi-Wan finally slowed down and breathed a sigh of relief. That sigh was enough to trigger a chain of racking coughs. When the coughing finally ceased, Obi-Wan saw thick, dark blood on the hand that had been covering his mouth.

The virus. It had to be. He and Anakin hadn't been able to find out much about the bioweapon. The only thing they knew for sure was that it was absolutely fatal. They had arrived on planet only to find every single inhabitant already dead. So much pain and suffering clung to every inch of the place. Even as two seasoned Jedi, the feel of it all in the Force had almost been too much. They each had quickly clamped shields strongly around their minds and set to finding whatever information they could to stop it from spreading.

Now, with almost all of his energy spent, those shields crumbled. All the misery came flooding in and was magnified by his own pain. Obi-Wan bent double, as if pressed by an invisible hand. He bit back a cry. He was alone on a dead planet, but he was still a Jedi. If it was the only thing he could manage, he would at least face death like a Jedi.

On his hands and knees now, Obi-Wan did his best to just breath. He felt like he was being crushed by a vice. The pain made his stomach roil. He gagged reflexively but only bile and blood dripped out. He squeezed his eyes shut to cut off the sight of it and tried to ignore the raw sting it left in his throat. Lights danced behind his eyelids. There was a ringing in his ears that muffled the world with white noise. Through that ringing he thought he heard fighting. The remaining droids must be trying to get in. Soon enough they'd be in and Obi-Wan hated himself for hoping they would come and end it.

The last thing he was aware of was the shrieking of plasma cutting through metal and a howl of horrible pain.


	6. The Sacrifice: Part Two

"Anakin."

His voice was perfectly calm. Perfectly collected. Surprisingly, he found he actually felt that way. After all he was dead. The pain had finally stopped and been replaced by a light, tingling feeling. Everything around him was a blinding white. Everything seemed right. Only...

"You're not dead, Obi-Wan," Anakin said.

"Ah. I was wondering why you were here," Obi-Wan said, a slight smile pulling at the corners of his mouth. The smile flickered and then faded. "How did you-"

"How did I know what you were thinking?" Anakin interjected. "Considering I thought you were dead when I found you, obviously you'd think the same thing when you finally woke up. Well, that and all your shields are still down."

Obi-Wan frowned, tried to rebuild his mental shields, and then frowned deeper.

"I think they'll be down for a bit. They've got you on some cocktail of drugs to slow the virus until they can actually stop it. Whatever they have you doped up on, I think it's made your connection to the Force a bit- what did they say- tenuous," Anakin explained.

"Spectacular," Obi-Wan muttered.

"Grumble all you want, Obi-Wan. I'm just glad I got you here in time. You should be too."

"And where is here, exactly?"

"We're in quarantine on the med bay in the Resolute until they decide we're no longer a threat."

Obi-Wan tried to sit up but immediately found he had no energy. He sunk deeper into the bed and settled for turning his head. Anakin was also lying on a bed beside him. He had a big, goofy grin on his face, as though this was all one big joke. It was hard to discern much else. The lights seemed painfully bright, though he was sure in a medical facility, they were probably dimmed.

He tried hard to think back and figure out how he'd gotten there. He remembered getting into the base and destroying the control panel. Then... he didn't remember anything else. He must have passed out.

"How did we get here, though?" he asked. "No, forget that- why are you here?"

Anakin turned his head so that he was looking at the ceiling instead of his former master. His mouth faded from a grin to a thin, tense line.

"There was blood. You had so much blood on you. I was in a rush. I must have cut myself on some shrapnel or something trying to get you out," he said in a shaking voice. "They thought it would be best to keep me here too until they knew if I was clear."

"But I saw you leave."

"You saw my ship leave. I set a distress signal on it and then sent out Artoo with the data crystal. I left a message with him too, so that they'd be prepared when they came to pick us up."

"You sent Artoo?" Obi-Wan said incredulously.

"He's learned a lot from me, you know. And I knew you'd get the laser array down, so it wasn't anything he couldn't handle on his own."

"You left the fate of millions with a droid?"

"I wasn't going to leave you to die," Anakin snapped. His voice softened when he added, "Even if I couldn't save you, did you really expect me to leave you to die alone?"

Obi-Wan ran a hand over his face and then blew out a frustrated sigh.

"Yes, I did. I thought you'd actually do your duty, although I can't fathom why."

Anakin looked at him with the grin on his face again.

"Ah, joking again. I knew you couldn't stay mad at me for long."

"This is still serious, Anakin. If not for duty, then for some sense of self preservation, I wish you had done as I'd asked."

"I'm perfectly fine. Well, banged up a little, but I'm not infected. At least, I don't think so."

Obi-Wan raised an eyebrow. "You don’t think so. Then why are you in here?"

"I told you, I'm not leaving you alone. So, um-" Anakin forced a cough, "-I'm sick. Or at least, that's what I told them. They're not letting anyone in or out except medical droids. It was the only way."

Obi-Wan resisted the urge to sigh again. It always seemed to come down to this. If someone Anakin cared about was in danger- real or imagined- then he would risk everything else to save that person. It didn't matter if his own well being or that of the entire galaxy was on the line, he would risk it all without a thought. But what could Obi-Wan say when he was so frequently the one being rescued? Anakin would likely just get angry instead of listening to what his former master was trying to teach him.

"Master, I know you're formulating some horrible lecture, so you might as well quit while you're ahead. I didn't do anything wrong. If anything, I should be lecturing you for throwing me off a cliff just because I wanted to help you," Anakin said and he gave a short bark of a laugh. "Plus, there's nothing you can do about it now. Like I said, neither one of us can leave, so you're stuck with me."

"Wonderful."

"Fine, think about it this way then. If I wasn't in here, I would be out there probably yelling at the medical staff for being slow and incompetent."

Obi-Wan was about to respond but he felt a catch in his throat when he opened his mouth. He closed his mouth again with a scowl. Anakin sat bolt upright and swung his long legs over the side of the bed.

"Are you alright?"

Obi-Wan opened his mouth but shut it again before he spoke. He could tell he would start coughing if he tried to talk now. Anakin seemed to sense this and so he reached into the Force instead. With all of his shields down, it made Obi-Wan feel uncomfortably exposed. He swatted futilely at the air as if he could physically repel the inspection.

"Oh, stay still," Anakin scolded.

Obi-Wan fought the temptation to stick his tongue out. Anakin clearly sensed this and gave him a playful prod with the Force.

"Ha, I'm wearing off on you," he said. There was little humor in Anakin's voice, though. He'd finished his inspection and he wasn't pleased. Obi-Wan watched as the younger man walked across the room to a comm unit.

"What's the status on that antidote?" Anakin asked.

"Skyguy?" came the immediate reply.

"Snips? Can you tell me what's going on out there?"

"Are you alright? I've been so worried and they won't let anyone in to see you or Master Obi-Wan and-"

"I'm fine. But I'm worried about Obi-Wan. Can you send in the medical droid? And you never said what the status was for that antidote"

"I don't think you'll like the answer."

"Ahsoka, just tell me."

"They said it would be at least four days before they could get everything they need to make it."

A tense silence followed. Anakin pressed his forehead to the wall and closed his eyes. When he finally responded, his voice was so low he had to repeat himself.

"Just send in the droid."

Anakin shut off the comm unit from his end. A moment later, the door opened and the medical droid walked in. Anakin picked the hapless droid up with the Force and quickly deposited it next to Obi-Wan. Obi-Wan opened his mouth but Anakin cut him off by holding up his hand.

"Don't," he said tersely. He turned on the droid. "Give him more medicine. It's not helping anymore."

"I'm sorry sir, but I already gave him as much as his body can handle," the droid answered.

"Then give him something else."

"There's nothing else I can give him right now. If I do, it could kill him."

Obi-Wan squeezed his eyes shut and tried to ward off the pain that was threatening to engulf him again. Anakin felt it as well, but he ignored it. He stalked over to the droid and loomed over it. His eyes flashed with barely suppressed frustration and anger.

"This virus will kill him if you don't do anything," he said.

"I'm sorry sir."

Anakin growled and plucked the droid straight off the ground with the Force again. He looked fully prepared to crush it out of existence but seemed to think better of it at the last moment. Instead he opened the door, threw it out of the room, and snapped the door shut behind it. He let out a low string of curses.

"I thought you were in here so that you wouldn't yell at the medical staff?" Obi-Wan said in a gravelly whisper.

Anakin sat on the edge of the bed and gave him a weak smile.

"I didn't yell," he said. "And you shouldn't talk. Just rest, Master."

"A little hard to rest when-"

The rest of Obi-Wan's sentence was lost in a string of rough coughs. His body tried to curl in on itself with every cough. Anakin slid closer and propped the older man up into a seated position and steadied him as best he could. When Obi-Wan stopped coughing, he sat for a few moments and took shallow, unsteady breaths. He raised his shaking hand before his eyes and saw that there was blood there again. He wanted to wash it away or at least wipe it off, but instead he just let it lay, palm up, in his lap. Anakin stared down at the hand with a mixture of horror and intense interest on his face. Obi-Wan looked at his former apprentice and furrowed his brow.

"What-"

"Shh," Anakin interjected. "I think I have an idea. Maybe. But first..."

Anakin placed a cool hand on Obi-Wan's now searing hot forehead. Before Obi-Wan could even try to protest, everything went black and he faded into a dreamless sleep. When he finally awoke again, he knew he had to still be alive because he felt too awful for it to be otherwise. It took a few moments for his eyes to refocus. When they did, he saw Anakin fast asleep in nearby chair. His head had lolled backward and soft snores were emitting from a gaping mouth. Obi-Wan smiled despite himself.

Having confirmed that he was still alive, Obi-Wan decided to test his grasp on the Force. He reached out and found it, then used it to drop a pillow onto Anakin's face. Anakin immediately jumped to his feet. He looked at the pillow on the floor and then at Obi-Wan.

"I thought you disapproved of frivolous use of the Force, Master," he said as he walked to the bedside.

"It wasn't frivolous. You were snoring," Obi-Wan said. He did his best to put on a completely blank expression.

"Hmm, maybe putting Skywalker blood in your veins wasn't such a good idea," Anakin replied.

"What?"

Anakin smiled and crossed his arms over his chest.

"I figured it out, Master. I knew I had to find a different way to help you so I got to thinking about the fact that I was still perfectly fine. I probably should have caught the virus and no one could explain why I hadn't. Which, of course, I didn't argue with at the time because I could stay here with you. But then I saw your blood and I wondered... what if I couldn't catch the virus? What if there was something in my blood?"

"I don't know if I like where this is going," Obi-Wan mumbled.

Anakin ignored him and continued on, "So I had them run a few quick tests and it turned out, for whatever reason, I was completely immune. The virus has zero effect on me. All they had to do was use some of my blood to counteract the virus in you. You're a little worse for the wear, but you'll be fine now."

Obi-Wan looked down at himself. "I can practically feel the Skywalker blood cells zipping recklessly fast through my body. I'll probably start tinkering needlessly with droids next or flying for the fun of it."

"We can only hope," Anakin laughed. "You know, though, it's pretty ironic that of all the people in the galaxy I would be the one immune to this thing. You'd think Dooku would be scheming up something to target me in particular, not leave me blissfully unaffected."

"Yes, well, let's just be happy you are flying under the Sith radar," Obi-Wan said.


	7. The Old Married Couple

"Anakin!"

Panic. But only a slight edge of panic. Obi-Wan still had his dignity. Or at least, he hoped so. It was hard to think of anything like dignity when he'd fallen into the mud for the second time in the last ten minutes. More specifically, the second time he'd been thrown into the mud. It seemed the swamp was making General Grievous cranky too.

Grievous swung four lightsabers down around Obi-Wan, and the beleaguered Jedi had to swing his limbs in four different directions to dodge. It was a close call. He could smell the singed fabric on his tunic mix with the rancid smell of sizzling mud.

"Anakin!" he called again into his comlink. This time all dignity was forgotten. He knew he sounded panicked.

"Master, I'm kind of busy here," came the response from his former padawan.

"You were supposed to be busy here," Obi-Wan panted as he rolled away from another blow.

"Yeah, well, I ran into a bit of trouble."

Obi-Wan sprang back to his feet then quickly ducked as two lightsabers crackled in the air where his head had been milliseconds before.

"Oh, I'm so sorry. A bit of trouble. Well don't let me keep you while Grievous tries to take off my head."

"Can't you deal with it for now? I've got at least a full company of battle droids on my hands."

"Battle droids? Oh dear, you should have said so before. I'll just go back to playing with Grievous and his squad of magnaguards."

"A company! Probably more."

"Yes, silly me." A blocked electrostaff.

"And some super battle droids."

"Certainly too much for the Chosen One. I only hope-"

The rest of Obi-Wan's remark was cut off when Grievous caught him with a surprise backhand. Obi-Wan stumbled and tried to blink off the stars in his eyes. He spat out a mouthful of blood and grimaced. Well now. He knew his wise cracks could be killer, he had just always hoped he wouldn't literally be killed for them.

Obi-Wan took a few steadying breaths and eyed his opponents. Thankfully, most of the magnaguards had moved back to higher ground to keep out of the swamp. As it was, Obi-Wan was amazed how little Grievous appeared hampered by the muck. It seemed brute strength and rage was enough to keep him fighting in the infernal sludge. Obi-Wan, on the other hand, was finding himself tiring much faster than he would have liked. It was time to end things.

He swung his lightsaber at Grievous' legs. Grievous tried to jump out of the way. He didn't take the mud into account, though, and ended up falling backwards. Obi-Wan moved forward to continue his attack, but one of Grievous' clawed feet shot up and caught him around the neck. The cyborg general let out a wheezing cackle as he slammed the Jedi down. Obi-Wan fought back a gasp as he was pressed under the shallow, murky water and into the mud. He could hold his breath for a long time if needed. That would hardly matter, though, if Grievous kept tightening his grip.

Obi-Wan clawed frantically to pry himself free, but it seemed like his efforts were futile, even with help from the Force. Every time he tried to move, the mud at the bottom of the swamp sucked him further down. He tried to think of a way out but his brain felt as murky and thick as the muck around him.

Suddenly, surprisingly, he felt the grip loosen. Without thinking of why, he scrambled to his feet. As soon as his head broke the surface of the water, he tore Grievous' detached foot from his neck and gasped hungrily at the air. He felt somewhat faint and staggered slightly when he tried to take a step. He shook his head to clear his mind and then swiped dripping bangs out of his eyes. That's when he saw the reason for his salvation.

Standing firmly between him and Grievous, was his former apprentice. Grievous was standing unsteadily on his only remaining foot, thick mud plastered to his eyes which he seemed unable to wipe away due to his mask. Anakin brought the Force to a swell and blew Grievous off his foot and into the magnaguards. While they recovered from the push, Anakin came to Obi-Wan's side.

"How many rescues does that make now, Master?" Anakin asked.

"I see you managed to survive your harrowing encounter with battle droids," Obi-Wan said with a voice that was a bit weaker than he would have liked.

"Back up finally came and I figured Snips was better at keeping herself out of trouble than you are," the younger man said.

"Only because she's wise enough to ignore your teachings from time to time," Obi-Wan replied, rubbing his sore neck.

"You look terrible, Master," Anakin said with a cheeky grin. "Ugh, and you smell worse."

Obi-Wan's eyes narrowed slightly. "This from the man who seems to relish in taking month long breaks between showers."

"Hey, I've been told I have a very musky, manly scent."

"And just who told you such a thing? No wait, I don't want to know, do I?" Obi-Wan said with a sigh. Anakin's grin just widened.

"Let's just finish this, shall we?" the younger Jedi proposed, quickly changing the subject. "I'll never hear the end of it if Snips finishes first and has to come help us. Unlike some people, I don't really like the idea of being saved by my Padawan."

"I only need to be saved because you put me in danger in the first place," Obi-Wan said with a frown. "I suppose you were taking another one of your 'short cuts' this time?"

"Well it would have worked if those droids weren't there," Anakin huffed. "Fine. Next time-"

"Ragh! Stop bickering, Jedi scum!" Grievous howled.

He reached out, grabbed two magnaguards, and flung them straight at the Jedi. Both men jumped in opposite directions, then immediately regrouped. The other droids quickly joined in the fray so they could avoid being forcibly thrust into battle. All banter was momentarily forgotten and 'The Team' was back in action. From all sides, the magnaguards stalked through the muddy waters in an attempt to surround the Jedi.

Anakin and Obi-Wan pulled the Force easily around them. At moments like these, it seemed to sing with their shared effort. Without a word or even a glance at each other, the two Jedi jumped gracefully into the air. They each landed on the head of a magnaguard. Before the droids could figure out what was going on, both men gave a swift, strong kick to their electrostaffs. The weapons fell into the water, and the Jedi used the Force to leap high into the air again as the water was filled with electric currents. In an instant, every magnaguard convulsed and then fell. The Jedi landed, completely unharmed, on the bank nearby.

Only Grievous remained. The cyborg general growled in rage. This delighted Anakin.

"Things aren't looking too good, Grievous. On top of everything, you seem to be shrinking. You're at least a foot short of what I remember," the young man quipped. He dodged effortlessly as a humming lightsaber grazed past his head.

"That was a pretty bad joke, Anakin," Obi-Wan said, joining his friend in trying to fend off a furious Grievous.

"Hey, you don't get any say about bad jokes. Your lifetime privileges were revoked long ago," Anakin replied after an unsuccessful thrust at Grievous' chest.

Suddenly Anakin's comlink buzzed to life.

"Master!"

"Snips, I'm a little busy here," Anakin replied, falling back from the fight for a moment.

"Yeah, well, you should be busy here," came the answer.

"Anakin," Obi-Wan said.

"Not now, Master," Anakin answered, his full attention on his comlink. "Can't you handle it, Snips? You have Rex and the guys helping you out."

"But you left me to fight a full company!"

"Of battle droids."

"And super battle droids."

"Anakin," Obi-Wan cut in again.

"I said not now Master," Anakin snapped back at Obi-Wan. "Snips, I'll be there soon enough."

"What's keeping you so long? I thought you said you just needed to help Master Obi-Wan and you'd be right back," Ahsoka's voice came back over the comlink.

"Right. I said I need to help Obi-Wan fight Grievous," Anakin replied.

"I don't think I'll be needing your help with Grievous any longer," Obi-Wan said.

This was enough to finally take Anakin's attention away from his conversation with Ahsoka.

"But- oh." Anakin finally noticed that the sounds of battle had ceased and his former master was the only other being in sight.

"As I was trying to tell you, the good general took your distraction as an opportunity to escape. Again," Obi-Wan said.

"Master, are you coming or not?" Ahsoka asked.

"Sure, Snips. Obi-Wan let Grievous escape, so I'll be right there," Anakin said and then switched off his comlink. "You coming Master?"

"Oh no, I think I'll leave you to it. I'd probably only let the droids escape too. You can have the honor of rescuing your padawan since you got her into trouble," Obi-Wan said with a dismissive wave.

"Only because I was rescuing you!"

"Which you wouldn't have needed to do if you were where you were supposed to be instead of taking a rather ill-advised short cut through enemy territory."

"Yeah but-"

"Just go help your Padawan, Anakin. There is a shower somewhere calling my name and I would hate to be late. Unlike some, I do not wish to cultivate a musky, manly scent," Obi-Wan said. He started to walk away but then paused. He looked sidelong at the younger man. "Oh, and Anakin, please do the same when you're done with your little rescue mission. I can smell you from over here."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Technically Anakin was never meant to have met Grievous until RotS, so I fudged things a little bit and made it so Grievous didn't see him.


	8. The Premonition

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Set a while before the start of AotC.

* * *

"Anakin."

Obi-Wan's voice was tight; from pain that wouldn't let him get to his feet, from an edge of anger that his Padawan wouldn't listen to him, and from something else. Something he never thought he'd associate with Anakin. Fear. He was afraid of what his apprentice might do, afraid of what the boy might become, and most of all, afraid that he was the cause of all of it.

"They need to be brought to justice," Anakin growled.

The young man was standing guard in front of Obi-Wan. Every muscle in his body seemed tensed. The line of his jaw was hard and angry. His lightsaber seemed to echo the hum of pent up energy resonating from Anakin in the Force.

"Perhaps, but what you want to do is not justice," Obi-Wan replied, trying to keep his voice neutral.

Anakin rounded on him. There was a barely contained fire visible in his eyes. "Why are you defending them after all they did? They drugged you and then tried to use you as a bartering chip. They're only out for themselves. They betrayed me."

It was not lost on Obi-Wan that Anakin most stressed how he had been betrayed. The boy was nothing if not loyal. It was unfortunate that such an unwavering sense of loyalty was not always a good thing. For with loyalty, there was always a danger of betrayal, and Anakin did not handle betrayal well.

This was dangerous territory. Obi-Wan knew he had to tread carefully. It stung that he had to be so cautious with teaching his own Padawan, but it had been this way since the beginning. Only now had it become so clear how dangerous a misstep could be. He had woken from unconsciousness to the hum of a lightsaber, a sharp cry, and the distinct feeling of death in the Force. He'd opened his eyes to Anakin pulling a dead body off of him.

"I'm not defending what they did but now is not the time to argue over what we'll do about it," Obi-Wan said. "We need to get out of here before more arrive."

Obi-Wan tried to get to his feet, but was only able to prop himself up on his elbows before the world started spinning around him. He fell onto his back once more. Anakin caught the feeble movement from the corner of his eye and was instantly at his master's side. He shoved some clutter out of the way and crouched to the floor. His lightsaber was still ignited but all of his attention was on Obi-Wan.

"Do you have any idea what they gave you?" he asked.

"Anakin, if I was aware enough to know what they were drugging me with, do you think I would have let it happen in the first place?" Obi-Wan responded dryly.

"Good point," Anakin muttered. "What do you remember?"

Obi-Wan pinched the bridge of his nose. Everything about this was giving him a headache.

"Nothing about how I got here. The last thing I remember I was in the middle of negotiating peace talks. How did you find me?"

Anakin turned his head and stared at the closed door. "You're right, we should get going. I think I could carry you but it might get tricky if I need to fight."

As mortifying as it was to think about being carried around by his Padawan, Obi-Wan knew he couldn't let himself be distracted by the comment.

"Anakin, I asked you a question."

"I overheard one of them bragging about how they'd managed to capture you. So I asked them where they were keeping you."

"I know you managed to befriend them, but do you expect me to believe they just told you? You are a Jedi as well. They knew that much, I'm sure."

"And I was a slave, like all of them," Anakin said. That angry edge was back in his voice. When slavery came up, it was never far behind. "And no, they didn't just tell me. I-"

"You what?"

Anakin held up a hand and after a moment Obi-Wan sensed it too. Someone was coming. He couldn't get a good grasp beyond that. Whatever he'd been drugged with was dulling his connection to the Force. Soon he heard footsteps rushing outside of the door. There was only one pair. That was good at least. The door opened and a young blue female Twi'lek ran in. Anakin sprang to his feet, causing her to skid to a halt.

"Oolami, what are you doing here?" Anakin asked.

"I could say the same of you, Anakin. I heard there was an intruder," the girl, Oolami, replied.

She saw scanned the room quickly and saw the two dead guards, a Wookie and a human male. Her eyes shot to Obi-Wan, who was still prostrate on the floor.

"You did this," she hissed.

"I am completely unarmed," Obi-Wan replied, resisting the urge to roll his eyes.

"Oh! Right," Anakin said. He reached to his side, and pulled his master's lightsaber off of his belt. He tossed the weapon lightly to Obi-Wan. Obi-Wan reached up to grab it but his reaction time was still off. The lightsaber clattered to the floor a few feet from his head. Oolami stepped forward to snatch it off the ground. In an instant she had the azure beam of Anakin's lightsaber at her neck. Without ever taking his eyes off of her, Anakin crouched down to retrieve the lightsaber and put it directly into his master's hands.

"Sorry, Master. I forgot you're not quite yourself," he said.

Obi-Wan could see astonishment and hurt in Oolami's eyes. There was something more going on here. She liked Anakin, maybe had even started to love him. He wasn't sure. He wasn't completely sure of anything at the moment.

"You did this?" she asked Anakin.

"They were going to kill him," Anakin replied.

"No. Our contact said he wanted the Jedi alive," Oolami said.

"Things can change. They certainly didn't look like they were about to make him tea when I arrived," Anakin remarked dryly, his voice venomous.

Oolami swallowed hard and the long lekku trailing down her back twitched in agitation. She edged forward. "Even so, he is our ticket to freedom. We were promised transport off this planet, new lives, in exchange for the Jedi. You told me you were a slave once. How can you not understand? We could have all been free and it would only cost this one human's life. Why won't you help us do that?"

"Why won't I help you? You all promised to help me. You said you would help us establish peace so that you could join the Republic. Then you would have been free."

"Do you really think, even if this planet managed to join the Republic, that we would have been freed?" Oolami asked with a harsh laugh. "How can you be so naive? If our masters didn't just try to keep us illegally, they would have sold us all off. But we found another way. We can still do it. It's not too late."

"Step any closer to him, and it will be too late for you to do anything," Anakin growled.

The anger that had been simmering beneath the surface before had completely boiled over now. Obi-Wan's mind, already swimming from unknown drugs, was now mired by the presence of the Dark Side. He had to do something now. He couldn't let Anakin slip away like this. He shouldn't just be lying around while his padawan threw everything away to try to protect him. As the master, he should be the one to protect Anakin, even from himself if need be. He had promised he would teach Anakin, promised to make him a Jedi.

Oolami took a half step back. She glared at Obi-Wan. He could tell that somehow she still blamed him for all of this. In her mind, she had found a way to make it his fault her friends were now dead. When she finally tore her eyes off of Obi-Wan, she moved closer to Anakin and her gaze turned pleading.

"You should leave with us. We can help others across the galaxy. Isn't that what you told me you most wanted to do? Will you let the Jedi make you lose sight of that? Are you happy just trading one master for another?"

Obi-Wan flinched at that. He'd always found it unfortunate that Anakin, so fresh from a life of slavery, still had to call others Master. He could tell that Oolami's comment had struck a chord with his apprentice. Anakin turned his head slightly to look at him. The look on his face was... complicated. Obi-Wan wished he had his wits about him so that he could attempt to read Anakin. Before he could even try, Anakin had turned back to Oolami.

"Leave Oolami. And let me leave before I decide to use the hard way out."

Tears were forming in Oolami's eyes now. She shook her head violently. She eased her hand toward the blaster hooked at her side. There was a slight tremor in her fingers that only got stronger when she touched the blaster.

"I won't leave and I can't let you go unless you leave your master behind."

"Like I said, don't make me take the hard way out. None of you can stop me."

"If you were on your own, maybe. Can you fight your way out with your master still incapacitated?"

Anakin's lips peeled back in a feral snarl.

"I'll do whatever I have to."

"So will I."

With that, Oolami fired at Obi-Wan. It was immediately deflected by Anakin's lightsaber. The blast caught Oolami in the knee and she crumpled to the ground. Half a second later, Anakin was standing over her with his lightsaber pressed in front of her neck again. He snatched the blaster out of her hand with the Force and flung it against the wall.

"Don't try that again," he said.

"Then kill me because if I cannot be free, then I'd rather be dead. I can't go back to that life. I can't. I'm as good as dead anyway. He promised us freedom but he also promised us death if we failed."

Something clicked in Obi-Wan's brain. This was important. There was a clue here to something... he just couldn't get a grasp of what it was.

"Who was your contact? Who wants me dead?" Obi-Wan asked.

Both Anakin and Oolami turned, surprised to hear Obi-Wan speak.

"I won't tell you anything," Oolami said. Her voice was strained and weak from pain but her hatred was plain.

Anakin rounded on her and moved his lightsaber closer. At this point she had to be uncomfortable from the heat of the plasma blade. She stared up at Anakin with wide, terrified eyes.

"Who?" Anakin said, and it was more of a command than a question. Obi-Wan could feel the immense pressure of the Force behind the question.

"I don't know who he is," Oolami cried. "He only ever contacted us through hologram messages. He wore dark robes with a hood. I could never see his face. All I know is that he was human... I think. And rich. Rich and powerful enough to free every slave on the planet. He promised us that. He just said we needed to capture Anakin Skywalker's master."

Well, that was disquieting. Obi-Wan didn't want to know who would go to such lengths to be rid of him. What bothered him more, though, was the way the request had been worded. Not to capture Obi-Wan Kenobi but Anakin Skywalker's master. Who wanted Anakin masterless? Or at the very least, who wanted him away from Anakin? And why? There were too many questions and he was in no shape to analyze any of them. Nor was it the time. A comlink on Oolami's hip buzzed to life.

"Oolami? Do you copy? Where are you?" it crackled.

Oolami's hand moved reflexively toward the device but stopped as the 'saber moved a fraction closer.

"Tell them everything is fine," Anakin commanded. Though it was still not touching, the skin was starting to burn from the proximity of the plasma. Oolami whimpered in pain.

"Anakin."

At the sound of his master's voice, Anakin took a half step back. He was breathing hard now as if undergoing a great struggle. Obi-Wan knew he had to act now; Anakin was reaching a breaking point. If the others came while they were still here, lives would be lost. Obi-Wan didn't want to be responsible for any more death. He didn't want Anakin to have to kill to defend him.

He'd been working to cleanse his system of drugs through the Force. His body still ached, assumedly from beatings he'd received while unconscious, and he still felt dizzy. That would all have to be ignored for now. He pulled the Force around him, let it bolster him, and got shakily to his feet. For a moment he thought he would fall back down, but he never got the chance. As soon as he got to his feet, Anakin ran over. He stooped a bit so that Obi-Wan was able to hook an arm around his tall padawan's shoulders.

"Master, you shouldn't be on your feet," Anakin said. In one of his ever changing moods, all anger had vanished and Anakin was now simply concerned for Obi-Wan.

"I'm fine, Anakin. And I don't think we have much of a choice. We need to get out of here. Now."

"Right," Anakin said, already formulating an escape plan. "I hid a speeder outside. We should be able to use that to get back to town."

"No!"

It was Oolami. She was back on her feet, although she looked close to passing out from putting weight on her blaster wounded knee. She had grabbed a blaster from one of the slaves Anakin had killed in rescuing Obi-Wan. Despite the pain she was in, her grip on the weapon was firm. She edged in front of the door.

"You can't leave. I won't let you leave."

She sounded completely hysterical. Obi-Wan couldn't blame her. Life for any slave was atrocious. For a girl like Oolami, he couldn’t even start to imagine. She had to be completely desperate not to return to that life. He wished that Anakin's plan had worked and that they had been able to save Oolami and the others like her from such a wretched existence.

It was too late for that now, though. Maybe another team could succeed, but he and Anakin wouldn't be able to continue this mission. Right now the only thing Obi-Wan was really concerned with was getting off planet. Too much longer in this situation and he was worried he might lose Anakin. Already his apprentice was starting to let anger slip back in.

"Get out of the way," Anakin rumbled.

"I'll kill you both if I have to," Oolami responded in a wavering, high pitched voice.

Before things could escalate again, Obi-Wan used the Force to move a bit of debris from the room to hit Oolami in the head and knock her unconscious. She slumped onto the ground with an expression of shock frozen on her face.

"Let's go," Obi-Wan muttered.

"You won't get any complaint from me," Anakin replied and they both hobbled out of the room as fast as they could. "Let's get off this rock."

Obi-Wan couldn't agree more with his Padawan. The faster and farther they got from here the better.


	9. The Threat

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Set just after the previous chapter.

* * *

"Anakin."

Quiet concern quickly rebuffed.

"You should still be resting Master."

Anakin was getting older. Already, at eighteen, he was able to work independently on missions. Obi-Wan knew, though he could hardly believe it at times, that soon the boy would become a Knight. While he still could, Obi-Wan had to act. He had to do whatever he could to guide his apprentice. He only wished he could find a way to make Anakin actually listen.

Their last mission had been a complete disaster; there was no way around that. From the start, Obi-Wan had had a bad feeling about it. He'd tried to be extra cautious and warn Anakin to do the same, but he should have known Anakin was never one to be held back by caution.

Obi-Wan tried to be there for his Padawan. He tried to listen and advise and help, but Anakin doesn't seem to want it. Or, more confusing still, he craves the attention desperately but refuses it from his master. Not this time. This time Anakin had gone too close to the edge. There were too many unresolved feelings. Too much Obi-Wan had to hear.

"We need to talk, Padawan.”

Anakin tensed at the controls of the ship. He didn't look back when he replied. "I'm sort of busy right now, Master."

"We're in hyperspace. You're not needed at the controls."

Anakin's turbulent emotions still hadn't settled from the mission. Anxiety and anger spiked and swirled around him. His fierce blue eyes, focused solidly forward, reflected the vivid light of hyperspace. Obi-Wan sighed.

"Meet me back in the cabin once you've set the computer to take over," he said.

Obi-Wan walked back to the small two person cabin he'd been resting in since take off. Most of the drugs he'd been given had worn off and the light healing trance he'd entered had helped with the other injuries he'd sustained. Still, he was a little shaky on his feet and he was glad to sit again. He pulled in a slow, deep, steadying breath. Then, a bit longer than it should have taken, Anakin stalked in. He walked over to his own bed and sat on the edge.

"Anakin."

"No. Don't start Master."

"I didn't even say anything yet."

"Good. You've already said enough."

"I only said your name."

"Yes, but you said it in that whole, 'I am very disapproving of everything you do and I want to let you know why you are wrong this time even though you're almost old enough to be a Knight' voice."

Obi-Wan blinked. "I was not aware I had such a voice."

Obi-Wan's own apprenticeship had been one full of, "Yes, Master. Of course, Master." It had been very odd at first going from such obedience to being the voice of authority. However, he'd quickly realized how necessary it was. If Anakin ever uttered the same phrases these days, it seemed they were always dripping with sarcasm. Clearly, special Master voices or not, Obi-Wan's authority had done little more than chafe at Anakin.

Obi-Wan pinched the bridge of his nose. A headache. Had he always had so many headaches or were they another gift Anakin had contributed to his life? No matter. He wouldn't let a headache stop him anymore than he would let Anakin's impudence throw him off track.

"I don't disapprove of everything you do Anakin, nor am I here to harp on something you did wrong," he said. "I just want to talk. This was a difficult mission and I'm sure you have some unresolved feelings. I want to help you release those emotions before they poison you."

Suddenly Anakin didn't seem so cocky.

"I don't know what you want me to say Master."

"Tell me what's bothering you."

Anakin clenched his fists on his knees.

"I'm still mad. I know I shouldn't be. I know I should just let it go, but I can't. You trusted me to do my part on this mission, and look what happened. I trusted a rogue group to help me just because they were all slaves. I didn't know anything else about them. I didn't need to. I gave them important intel. I put my life and yours in their hands."

Anakin stood again and started to pace. He went forward. Backward. Left. Right. Constant erratic motion. It was so very Anakin, and at the moment, it was rather worrisome. His breathing was ragged with a building, barely contained rage. He paused for a moment to stare at Obi-Wan, then whipped back around.

Obi-Wan waited for Anakin to continue, but he was soon let down. Anakin was too busy building up his ire to continue trying to get it out. So Obi-Wan decided to change tactics. If he wanted to help Anakin, he would need to take a more direct route. There was one thing he needed to deal with. It had been bothering him since he'd awoken, surrounded by death. They had been interrupted before, but this time Obi-Wan was determined to get answers.

"How did you find me?"

Anakin froze midstep. He seemed to suddenly deflate as his rage was replaced by something else. His eyes flicked sidelong at Obi-Wan. He then strode over to the room's sole window. He gazed silently through the transparisteel. Every line in his body was tense.

"They said they'd kill you, Master."

Pain was clear in Anakin's voice. Obi-Wan wanted to reach out. He wanted to comfort his Padawan. He knew, though, that was just attachment speaking. He cared for Anakin probably more than he should as a Jedi. As a master, he knew it was his duty to do not what he wanted, but what Anakin needed to become a good Knight. If Anakin had skirted the Dark Side, Obi-Wan had to know about it. He locked his gaze on Anakin's back. Anakin sensed the eyes behind him. His fingers gripped hard onto the window frame.

"Anakin."

Anakin's emotions became flat and completely unreadable. Against the brightness of hyperspace, he seemed suddenly dark and menacing. Although he was technically an adult now, Obi-Wan had still always seen him as the small boy he'd taken in. Not now. Just what kind of man had he grown into?

"I did what I had to. I couldn't lose you," Anakin said in a low voice. "I did whatever I needed to make sure I got to you in time."

And just what did that mean? Obi-Wan wanted to ask, but found the words were stuck in his throat. He wasn't afraid Anakin would fall. Not really. Still...

"Did you kill them?"

Anakin made an indistinct noise of disgust. "Not unless you count the trash that were about to kill you. It was them or you. If that was wrong then fine. Punish me for saving your life."

No. Obi-Wan wouldn't fault his apprentice for those deaths. It had been a bit disconcerting to wake to, but if Anakin had really been acting in his defense... well, he only wished he was completely sure that defense had been Anakin's only motivation. At least he was sure Anakin wasn't lying about not murdering for information on his missing master.

"Then what?"

Anakin went back to pacing until he came to a decision. He stopped and faced Obi-Wan. "Why does it matter? Everything I did, I did to save you."

"Why does it matter? Anakin, not everything done with good intentions is itself good. The prize you win might not be worth the price you pay to win it," Obi-Wan said.

"I'll keep that in mind next time your life is in danger," Anakin snapped.

"I'm thankful you saved my life, it's just-"

"Well, you're not acting like it. Why can't you just let this drop?"

Obi-Wan stood up abruptly at the question. He was still a bit unsteady on his feet, but he brushed Anakin off when his Padawan reached out to brace him. He crossed his arms over his chest and looked Anakin dead in the eyes. Even though his apprentice had outstripped him in height, Obi-Wan knew the boy- man- could still be intimidated.

"You know why," he said.

There was a quiet desperation in Anakin's eyes. He turned on his heel, once again unable to face Obi-Wan. Obi-Wan realized Anakin was afraid he wouldn't be forgiven. At first Obi-Wan was hurt that his apprentice doubted him, then he started to worry what was so bad that he couldn't be forgiven.

"You're all I have, Master. If I lose you, I'll be alone. I don't want to be alone,” Anakin said in a voice barely above a whisper. "They said whoever they'd contacted would kill them if they told me. I convinced them there were worse alternatives."

Anakin walked out of the room before Obi-Wan could say anything more. Obi-Wan let him go. It wasn't an answer. Not entirely anyway but what was left unspoken told volumes. He knew it was the only answer he'd get unless he forced the information out of Anakin. He would have to let it go for now and hope a day would come when Anakin was no longer afraid to open up to him.


	10. The Last Time

"You were my brother Anakin." A shuddering breath. Tears burned away instantly by scorching heat. "I loved you."

Anakin looked up at him. Obi-Wan wanted to look away but he couldn't. If only for the barest of moments, there was something almost light in Anakin's eyes. There was a sort of wonder there. Was Anakin really so shocked by what he'd said? Did he never really know? But then, Obi-Wan had never said so much with every single word. Nothing was held back. There was no reason to when it could be the last time he ever spoke to Anakin, ever uttered his former apprentice's name. Everything he knew and loved had been completely destroyed by Anakin, including Anakin himself.

Reality hadn't completely hit during the fight. For the most part, Obi-Wan had let his body run on autopilot. By sinking into the Force, it had been easy to fight with Anakin. It was no different than the countless times that he'd sparred with his former apprentice. There had been moments, of course, when reality had come rushing back- Anakin never would have tried to strangle him, sparring or not- but those passed quickly enough. At last the time came when Obi-Wan couldn't just act on instinct. When he'd gained the high ground, he knew the moment had come when he would have to either kill or be killed. He knew what he was supposed to do. As a Jedi he had sworn to destroy the Sith. The problem was, despite everything, he still couldn't see Anakin as a Sith. So he'd tried to warn Anakin and prevent doing what he had to do.

Now everything was wrong. It was all completely and utterly wrong. Anakin. Anakin, so young and strong and vibrant and mobile- always moving, always on the move- couldn't be this thing that was before him. Gone the blue eyes that had sparkled with mischief and curiosity. Red and yellow eyes, burning like this hateful planet, were all that remained. Gone bare, blatant love that was so very un-Jedi but so beautifully, perfectly Anakin. Hatred, instead, was spewed forth willingly at the man who loved him like a brother, like family.

Then it happened.

Fire leaped to life on Anakin's mutilated legs. It spread and consumed every inch of him. Though he hated himself for doing it, Obi-Wan finally looked away. As much as he wanted to hate Anakin, to loathe him, he couldn't. He blamed himself as much as he blamed his fallen apprentice, maybe more. This at least, right here and now, was completely his fault. No one could deny him that. Though he'd begged not to fight Anakin, he'd cut Anakin down and reduced him to a smoldering half-man. It was crueler than killing outright.

Obi-Wan forced himself to take one final look at what he'd done. What he saw was burned into his memory forever. He did not notice the rancid smell of burning flesh and hair, nor did he see the burning, unrecognizable wreck of a man. All he saw was Anakin reaching up to him. Anakin's hated metal arm was the only limb he had left and it was stretching up to Obi-Wan. It was both a futile attempt to escape the lava and a heart wrenching, silent plea for help. Obi-Wan wanted nothing more than to answer that plea. He wanted desperately to scramble down the ashy banks and bring Anakin to safety. But Anakin was no more. There was only Vader. And so, Obi-Wan left. He would leave Anakin's fate to the Force. He was determined, step by agonizing step, to walk away.

He didn't make it far. Just as he climbed over the first ridge, he collapsed. He could no longer see Anakin but agonized cries filled the air. Every inch of Obi-Wan's body was shaking. Nausea rolled over him and he retched. He hadn't eaten anything since before his final fight with Grievous, hadn't wanted to eat since this all began. So his body continued to try in vain to purge itself of a sickness that was far more than just physical.

Then it all faded away and he saw everything. Every memory of Anakin flashed through his mind in an instant. Anakin as he shivered and cried his first night in the Temple. Anakin as he turned on every faucet in their quarters and watched in awe as water flowed and flowed without end. Anakin as he held a lightsaber for the first time with such reverence it might have been funny if it wasn't so absolutely endearing. Anakin as he quivered with unchecked excitement when they left for their first mission as a team. Anakin as he made faces at his master's newly grown beard. Anakin as he sat at Dex's Diner for the very first time and marveled that his master actually had friends that did something other than meditate. Anakin, unshakably strong and determined, as he sparred so soon after being fitted with a prosthetic arm. Anakin as he stopped a moment to marvel at his braid-free reflection. Anakin as he watched his Padawan with blatant pride, unaware that someone was watching him. Anakin, his brother, as he said goodbye. Anakin as he could have been, content and calm at last with wife and child.

Padme. The baby.

Reality snapped back while tears mix in a pool of bile and mud. Ragged screams continued to ring in the distance as Obi-Wan forced himself back to his feet. He ran the back of his hand absentmindedly across his mouth.

Danger flashed bright through the Force. So Yoda had failed. Obi-Wan could linger no longer. He needed to get to Padme and make sure she was alright. He could not help Anakin any longer but that didn't mean that everything was lost. Somehow, hope had been born from the most impossible of circumstances and Obi-Wan was going to do all he could to nurture it.

 

* * *

 

 

When Obi-Wan had left Anakin on the lava bank all those years ago, he had lost hope for his fallen brother. He had not thought that, ultimately, the Dark Side would prevail, but he hadn't dared to hope the salvation of the galaxy would also be the salvation of Anakin.

So much had happened that it was almost ridiculous to see Anakin like this. Somehow the broken, shell of a man had been restored. Padme had been right. There had still been a shred of goodness inside of Anakin and their son succeeded where Obi-Wan had failed. It had been a long and painful journey for both of them, but seeing Anakin now made Obi-Wan feel like it had all been worth it.

Every scar and injury that Anakin had ever received was gone. He was young and strong and whole again. More amazing still, there wasn't a trace of the fear, anger, or pride that had plagued him for so long. Instead, there was joy, relief, and a touch of quiet wonder. His best moments in life couldn't compare to Anakin as he was joined to the Force; he'd transcended to at last become the Jedi that Obi-Wan had always believed he could be.

Together in the Force, neither man had to apologize for past wrongs or explain themselves. Everything was understood. There was only one thing Obi-Wan had to say. It was the one word that meant more than anything and the one word he had thought he'd never say again. Obi-Wan said it all with a wide smile and an outstretched, welcoming arm.

"Anakin."


End file.
